Yes, it's hard to put your emotions into words when the love of your life has just sucker punched your heart. So allow me to help!
Wanton Domestic Seperationism; An awaking and cognizant act of
admitting to one’s self, that you may be the only sane person in this
relationship. Followed by late night secretive scheming and detailed planning
of your escape back to the realm of Reality, Nil Desperandum! (Page 238)
Compatatational suicide; Knowing that you are consciously
driving your lover crazy. A willingness to do something that will impale a
grave wedge into the very heart of your closeness. Taking one for granted for
far too long, followed by an unconscious willingness not to care. (Page 46)
Marital Blisslessness; The absence of marital bliss. That
lonely feeling experienced while sleeping next to the love of a lifetime and
feeling utterly alone, once again. Usually followed by claiming squatter’s
rights to both the remote and the living room couch, all night, every night,
forever. Amen. (Page 153)
Extreme Companionshiplessnessism; when the term “together” does not
include your significant other. It does include the kids and some family pets.
The act of being companionless, even when you hold your life’s partner close to
you. Followed very closely by a nervous trip to the local divorce attorney.
(Page 71)
Rut-a-tation factor; a rating of just how lonely you are
standing next to your significant other. Rut-a-tation is a phenomenon that
occurs in relationships sinking from the excess baggage of
Taken-for-grantedism, competition, and the awkward realization that you do not
really know your lover, anymore, at all. (Page 208)
There, now don't you feel better?
No comments:
Post a Comment